Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
