Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
They are going to name an STD after you.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
