all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
