i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
