Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
