Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
