people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
