Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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