hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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