sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
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