I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
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