I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
