Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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