ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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