I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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