I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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