I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize