I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
