but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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