if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
