Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
