I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
