I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
