yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
