is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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