Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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