Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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