champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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