Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
