don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
All I want is dick and wine.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
