have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
