Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i think my mom watched the whole time
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
