i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
