You work out of a Hotel?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You pole danced in your parka.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
