I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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