road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
