What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Randomize
