I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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