And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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