He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Success! We fucked roommates!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
