My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
