We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
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