I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize