from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
