Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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