you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
