That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize