Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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