Hey man sorry I got all grabby
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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