I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I've blown a few things in my day
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
